It’s the 4th of July here in the States so that means I get to be lazy and eat hamburgers and hotdogs and get even fatter than I already am.  In order to celebrate this day, I present to you Ashley Tisdale’s flat ass.  Enjoy!  See you on Monday!

I know there’s side boob and under boob, but what do they call what this?  Middle Boob?  Not that I’m upset that Christina Ricci decided to share it with us but I’m just a bit confused as to what to call it.  Middle Cleavage?  The Valley of the Breasts?  Titi-Fuck Lane?  Oh, that last one was just awful.

• DMX is under arrest - Mollygood
• Matt Damon is fat and unattractive - CelebParasite

• Tyra Banks looks great as a wax figurine - Dlisted
• Mariah Carey might be ready to lose it all - Not Obsessed

• Mario Lopez is a tremendously gay - Seriosuly OMG
• Hollywood Roles reversed - Cityrag

• Amy Winehouse is under house arrest - ICYDK
• The first 5 minutes of the new Batman movie - Popoholic

Adriana Lima is on top of the world right now.  She’s one of the sexiest women on the planet, she’s engaged to a mediocre NBA player, and it looks like she’s just heard the world’s funniest joke.  It has to be the best joke ever because it’s turned her into a rabid chipmunk.  Or a giggling asian woman.  I can’t tell.  Pick whichever one is less offensive and run with it.

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How slow must the day be for me to write something about Kate Hudson merely getting coffee?  The answer of course is mind-numbingly slow.  When I say nothing is going on, I mean it.  It’s summer people.  Get in a friggin’ bikini and show us some skin already.  Geez!

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Ashley Tisdale, as hard as it is to believe, is 23 years old.  I think she seems younger because she plays characters on the Disney channel and they cover everyone up with turtlenecks and long dresses.  Ashley you need to do some movies on Cinemax.  Nude it up.  Then you’ll get some real attention.  You should bring that cute asian co-star of yours with you too.

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• An ode to hot asses around the world
• Someone’s cleavage came out to play
• This doucebag is back on the prowl
• Another International Babe of the Day

• Paz Vega takes her body to the beach
• A Friends Movie?
• Messing with Driving Instructors
• This chick dumped Tila Tequila

I’m assuming Elisabetta Gregoraci is Italian because of her name.  I dont know what the deal is but I’ve been seeing alot of hot Italian women in bikinis lately and it’s making me wonder what the hell is going on over there.  Maybe the Derek Hail staff needs to take a trip over there and do some research.  By that of course I mean put my penis in many Italian women.  You know, for scientific purposes only of course.

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• Rachel Hunter got really fat - Yeeah
• Celebrity Sideboob Show - Cityrag

• Marc Anthony and J-Lo go out on the town - Not Obsessed
• Two dumb sluts have lunch with Goldie Hawn - Ninja Dude

• Moon Bloodgood shows off her rack - Popoholic
• Charlize Theron at the Hancock Premiere - Tunaflix

Christina Milain.  Wow.  Thank God she decided to come out of hiding and take the place Jessica Alba’s ass once held because it’s going to be a while before that pregnancy ass goes away.  Jessica Biel is nice.  Vida Guerra looks like a Cocker Spaniel.  It’s behinds like Christina Milian’s and Izabel Goulart’s that really make the world go round.  Ask scientists, they know.

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